Dating a widow with young children too soon
If I could just have the perfect man magically show up at my door one day, I would choose that option in a heartbeat (side note: if anyone knows the perfect man, please contact me and I will send you my address).Unfortunately, more likely than not, that’s not going to happen, so I am choosing to put myself back out there into the world and see what happens.From what they tell me, dating a widower isn’t easy. They might also feel worried about other people’s perceptions. Physical reminders–mementos, personal effects, wedding pictures are difficult to see around the house. In any other situation, finding a mate is all happiness, but with a widower, it can be tempered with guilt.Right now I am not looking for love; I am happy to just meet new people and have good conversation. Maybe one day I will be sitting on the porch with my husband yelling at all the hooligans that walk by. I still believe that love is in my future, but I’m not going to find it sitting on the sidelines. But if love finds me again, I will gladly welcome it. A solid relationship is built on a foundation of friendship and friendship is built on communication and trust. Don’t be afraid to be real, even if that means being a goofball. Never in a million years did I think that I would ever have to navigate the dating world again. I just have to allow that it will not be the same man I had thought I’d be sitting with.
I suspect it will take a special kind of man to even want to date me, and be strong enough to embrace my story. Your efforts will not go unmatched, but I don’t have time or inclination to chase after you. My heart has been broken and it may take a minute for me to share it again.
So sharing my heart on this subject is probably one of the harder things I’ve opened up about since being widowed.
But I don’t write about things because they make me comfortable.
They might think, ‘Does being happy make people think I didn’t love my spouse? You don’t want to sound insensitive, but you want him to start letting go of the past and embracing the future.
That’s not easy to do if his late wife’s clothes are still hanging in her closet.